God is always moving forward, not back!
You can’t go back and change what they did to you!
- They didn’t treat you the way you should’ve been treated.
- They didn’t love you in your family of origin.
- They betrayed you.
- They didn’t give you the promotion you worked so hard for.
- They lied and gossiped about you.
My father and mother walked out and left me,
but God took me in. ~ Psalms 27:10, The Message Bible [MSG]
You can’t go back and change what you did to others!
- You lived with bitterness, and it spilled over onto others.
- You weren’t responsible, and it harmed others.
- You weren’t a loyal person, and you ruined past relationships.
- You were lazy, and others had to do more than their share of duties/work.
For I will demonstrate my mercy to them and will forgive their evil deeds, and never remember again their sins. ~ Hebrews 8:12 [The Passion Translation, TPT]
As believers, we don’t need a PhD in theology to notice in the Bible God used a lot of highly imperfect people. They made mistakes and treated people badly, and/or others had treated them badly. In fact, it might be easier for God to use flawed people because, they’re not so ‘holier than thou’, that they can’t be used at all. It seems God picks people with a bit of humility who have been through some life battles who He can equip for His purposes. So, no matter what kind of a mess we’ve made, He can still use us for good. In the process, He can also bring peace and joy to our lives.
So what is it that is torking us off and twisting us up inside? Did we come from an abusive background, then married and divorced an abusive spouse, and we’re just mad, mad, mad? We can be blood bought and know we’re going to heaven and still have this low-level, simmering anger on the back burner. Our spirit was saved when we accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior. The Holy Spirit came to dwell in our human spirits. But our souls (mind, will, and emotions) and flesh were not saved. Our souls and flesh have to be renewed and regenerated and this is a for the rest of our life journey.
There is a simple Biblical tool we can use to help us forget past hurts and to have more peace and joy in our lives. It’s the law of sewing and reaping. First of all, we’re to sew into good ground, not cast our seed toward someone or something we know is a poor prospect. For example if we were rejected by our parents as a child, then felt rejection since, and now feel lonely, we can sew friendliness. We don’t have to give money to someone, deep down, we know is a user. Remember…good ground. We don’t have to give money at all, or loan our car. Just friendliness.
Friendliness is of our inner self. Give a smile. Open and hold a door for someone. Say hello to people at church and remember their names, so you can use their name the next time. Introduce yourself to the pastor. Tell him/her what a good sermon it was. When their faces light up and they smile back, receive it and in that moment let it warm you. Let the experience go both ways. Ah, but you’ve always been reserved, an introvert. Receive it for what it is and feel good about it. It’s just a smile, a simple smile. It’s not a lifelong commitment. It’s not even an invitation to brunch, but it’s a start. Enjoy the moment, and resolve to move forward from there.
I have to keep telling myself these very things. I came from a reclusive family. We were definitely not movers and shakers in the local social scene. I had to learn how to make friends as an adult. ~~ Don’t keep looking back at past hurts. Test the friendship water. Yes, test. Test! That’s using wisdom. Some people will not be up your alley. That doesn’t make them bad people. They’re just not your cup of tea. Smile and keep on going. Put your little toe into the shallow end of the people-pool. Keep engaging , keep smiling, laugh a little. It feels good.
If you like to read murder mystery fiction having intense and difficult relationships between the characters, check out HARMFUL INTENT. Brooklyn (NYC) private investigator Veronica “Ronnie” Ingels has been betrayed. She rushes to visit a best friend in Abilene, Texas where deputy sheriff Dawson Hughes puts her at the top of his suspect list for a murder. ~ inspirational, clean reads.