You Can’t Go Back ~ victory is in your future!

car trip

God is always moving forward, not back!

You can’t go back and change what they did to you!

  • They didn’t treat you the way you should’ve been treated.
  • They didn’t love you in your family of origin.
  • They betrayed you.
  • They didn’t give you the promotion you worked so hard for.
  • They lied and gossiped about you.

My father and mother walked out and left me,
    but God took me in. ~ Psalms 27:10, The Message Bible [MSG]

You can’t go back and change what you did to others!

  • You lived with bitterness, and it spilled over onto others.
  • You weren’t responsible, and it harmed others.
  • You weren’t a loyal person, and you ruined past relationships.
  • You were lazy, and others had to do more than their share of duties/work.

For I will demonstrate my mercy to them and will forgive their evil deeds, and never remember again their sins. ~ Hebrews 8:12 [The Passion Translation, TPT]

As believers, we don’t need a PhD in theology to notice in the Bible God used a lot of highly imperfect people. They made mistakes and treated people badly, and/or others had treated them badly. In fact, it might be easier for God to use flawed people because, they’re not so ‘holier than thou’, that they can’t be used at all. It seems God picks people with a bit of humility who have been through some life battles who He can equip for His purposes. So, no matter what kind of a mess we’ve made, He can still use us for good. In the process, He can also bring peace and joy to our lives.

So what is it that is torking us off and twisting us up inside? Did we come from an abusive background, then married and divorced an abusive spouse, and we’re just mad, mad, mad? We can be blood bought and know we’re going to heaven and still have this low-level, simmering anger on the back burner. Our spirit was saved when we accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior. The Holy Spirit came to dwell in our human spirits. But our souls (mind, will, and emotions) and flesh were not saved. Our souls and flesh have to be renewed and regenerated and this is a for the rest of our life journey.

There is a simple Biblical tool we can use to help us forget past hurts and to have more peace and joy in our lives. It’s the law of sewing and reaping. First of all, we’re to sew into good ground, not cast our seed toward someone or something we know is a poor prospect. For example if we were rejected by our parents as a child, then felt rejection since, and now feel lonely, we can sew friendliness. We don’t have to give money to someone, deep down, we know is a user. Remember…good ground. We don’t have to give money at all, or loan our car. Just friendliness.

Friendliness is of our inner self. Give a smile. Open and hold a door for someone. Say hello to people at church and remember their names, so you can use their name the next time. Introduce yourself to the pastor. Tell him/her what a good sermon it was. When their faces light up and they smile back, receive it and in that moment let it warm you. Let the experience go both ways. Ah, but you’ve always been reserved, an introvert. Receive it for what it is and feel good about it. It’s just a smile, a simple smile. It’s not a lifelong commitment. It’s not even an invitation to brunch, but it’s a start. Enjoy the moment, and resolve to move forward from there.

I have to keep telling myself these very things. I came from a reclusive family. We were definitely not movers and shakers in the local social scene. I had to learn how to make friends as an adult.  ~~  Don’t keep looking back at past hurts. Test the friendship water. Yes, test. Test! That’s using wisdom. Some people will not be up your alley. That doesn’t make them bad people. They’re just not your cup of tea. Smile and keep on going. Put your little toe into the shallow end of the people-pool. Keep engaging , keep smiling, laugh a little. It feels good.

 

ribbon pink

If you like to read murder mystery fiction having intense and difficult relationships between the characters, check out HARMFUL INTENT. Brooklyn (NYC) private investigator Veronica “Ronnie” Ingels has been betrayed. She rushes to visit a best friend in Abilene, Texas where deputy sheriff Dawson Hughes puts her at the top of his suspect list for a murder. ~ inspirational, clean reads.Harmful Intent 400 P

 

 

 

 

Flying Solo ~ so, what’s that about?

Fighter Piolot

Party of One.

Flying Solo doesn’t mean there are no other people around. It means you alone are in the cockpit flying the craft. The fighter pilot has a ground crew, yet, when he’s at the controls, it must often feel as if he is alone. As believers, we are in the army of God, and for some of us who have lost a mate, who have prayed for a mate and are still single, whose mate has repeatedly and consistently been unfaithful or alcoholic or drug addicted or addicted to pornography, those who have outlived all their relatives and friends, or for some other reason are living alone…the reality might be we are flying solo. And we really are. It’s not just a cute statement. We go home and we’re cooking for one, watching TV alone, sleeping alone in the bed. An individual can be in assisted living or in a nursing home surrounded by people and still be solo.

Flying Solo also doesn’t mean that there is no radar system. As believers, we have the Holy Spirit and we must develop a closer relationship with God. That’s an absolute if you are flying solo. You need the best guidance system you can possibly have and that starts with making Jesus the Lord of your life, and getting into the manufacturer’s manual…the Bible.

I’ve been a widow for nearly four years, yet it was only about six months ago that it hit me, as if I’d slammed into a wall, that I was flying solo and what that really meant. I wish I could say I handled it in a delightfully pretty and delectably appropriate manner. I didn’t. Still, I’m pretty stoic. I kept functioning. My house was clean, I fed my strays every morning and my inside cats, walked Sophie the Wonder Dog twice a day and fed her. Published my latest murder mystery release by the deadline. But, but…emotionally, I was messy, messy, messy.

Of course, I went to ‘my’ default. Whining. I whined to friends and associates. And mostly, I whined to God. And I heard very clearly in my spirit that I should pay attention to my feelings and actions because God had given me the gift of writing and my assignment was to write about flying solo for the purpose of helping other people. So, I whined about THAT to God. I’m pretty sure the Bible says, “Whining endureth for a season.” It’s probably in the Taylor Swift translation.

So, what have I learned about flying solo in the last six months? To go back to the basics.

PRAY. Pray for yourself, bless your house, your pets, put a prayerful hedge or protection around yourself and what’s yours. Talk to God. It’s okay to have an out-loud, running convo with God. Talk to Him as if He’s an older, wiser friend, a father, a brother. He’s all that. Pray for others. Pray for their healing, prosperity, the health and protection of their children. Pray for the nation. Keep it up and soon you’ll become a prayer warrior without even trying.

KEEP AFTER THE DETAILS. Get up, get dressed, eat nutritious meals. Keep your home/surroundings in good order. God loves you. Take care of yourself. And, as much as you can, surround yourself with the things you love.

KEEP IN TOUCH. You have a phone, so use it. Phone, text, and/or email friends and associates. Get involved on social media. Facebook has groups you can join. So do other social media platforms.

GO OUT. Don’t stay trapped in your home. Go to church…and also to the mid-week service. Don’t have a church? Go church shopping for a few weeks or months until you find one that’s warm, comfy, and welcoming for this stage of your life. Get your hair cut and/or styled regularly and start a convo with your stylist. Go to the library, sit, read some magazines, recipe books, holiday decorating books, health and beauty books. Ask the librarian to guide you. Start a dialog, but a quiet one…it’s the library.

I hope this is helpful. I’ll be praying for everyone who subscribes and /or reads this blog.

Celebrating Thanksgiving ~ and purposing to enjoy it solo

Thx Pix 1
The fun of adding pumpkins, Pilgrim figurines, and a harvest angel to my baker’s rack. Oh, yeah, and a pesky cat got into the shot.

When Joseph was alive I prepared a huge Thanksgiving feast for family and a friend or two. I was known for my super moist turkey, and it was so simple. I’ll let you in on the secret. I got it years ago from Cooking Light magazine. You mix equal parts of maple syrup and unsweetened jarred apple sauce and smother the bird in it. Sounds horrible, doesn’t it. But the whole mess, and it is a mess, cooks away and you have an apple/maple glaze and a really moist and tender bird. I always cooked my bird at 325 degrees and it’s really good to use a meat thermometer to know when it’s done. Nothing is worse than eating raw poultry. I made the a traditional giblet stuffing recipe from the back of the stuffing package and added chopped dates and chopped, peeled apples and stuffed the bird. Of course, you also have to bake a pan of it, and the trick there is to pour broth over it so it’s not dry. I can’t give a recipe because I don’t cook with recipes, as a rule. I’ve spent years enjoying myself pouring over cookbooks, especially holiday cookbooks, trying different “tricks of the trade” my mother, grandmother, or a friend passed along. It got to where I cooked by eye and by taste. Yes, you have to keep a teaspoon or two or three at the stove to taste or you can get in real trouble. Add a little spice, butter, whatever, then taste. You can always add more but you can’t take out.

Thx Pix 2
My mantle and another pesky cat. She’s annoyed because I disturbed her nap.

So, now it’s just me, Sophie the Wonder Dog, and as as Sophie refers to them, “those pesky cats.” About six months ago, a series of circumstances occurred and it hit me like a tidal wave that I was basically alone on this planet. And yes, I stewed and whined about it. If you know me at all, if I didn’t admit to whining, you’d know I wasn’t telling the truth.

Of course, it goes without saying, so I almost didn’t say it.,,I have God. I have Jesus. And of course, I have friends and associates. However, as I get up in years, I find that my friends have issues they are dealing with, some excruciatingly serious. So, I really do have to exercise my “spiritual chops” and lean in to God, follow Him, rely on Him, and seek His face.

One thing I keep hearing Him say in a variety of ways is, “Live life. You are fearfully and wondrously made. Don’t stop celebrating life.” I recently heard Joyce Meyer say on a broadcast that we humans are the closest things to God. We have been made in His image and likeness. And we should act like it. We have to choose to do that. It’s a decision we have to make and sometimes re-make.

So, I’ve been invited to a huge southern family Thanksgiving Day dinner in central Florida. I’ve been informed (forewarned maybe) that it will be an experience. Looks like God has a new delight in store for me.

Thx Pix 3
My mantle at night. Now I’m anticipating decorating for Christmas!!!

 

Victory Over Despair In A Krazy World ~ the ultimate kind

Don't jump off the end of a pier. Sit down on it and pray.
Don’t jump off the end of a pier. Sit down on it and pray.

 

The Lord spoke to my heart reminding me there are many people who read this blog who feel beset on all sides. They have health issues, or they’re home or car is about to be taken away from them by the bank, they’ve just lost their job, their children are flunking in school, and the like. Most of those who read this blog are Christians, but not all. And when the Lord gave me this inner witness, He wasn’t only talking about believers. Many are hurting right now.

Now is the time for each of us to understand on a deep level that God wants the best for all people. That He loves all people.

Now is the time to understand God has the answer for each of us. It’s time to stop looking to the media for answers, even our favorite media outlets. The media lies, twists the truth, or at the very least presents a mostly negative view of life because they think that garners viewers. So, you have to not take that as your reality, knowing at the very least that picture of life is skewed. Lift your eyes to a higher place. Know the situation is better than what you’re getting from the secular world’s point of view. Know, no matter how horrible it is, you can go through and come out.

Isaiah 61:3a [NASB] ~ To grant those who mourn in Zion (put here wherever you live) , Giving them a garland instead of ashes, The oil of gladness instead of mourning, The mantle of praise instead of a spirit of fainting.

The NIV translations says, “a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”

God has given you praise as a weapon to defeat despair. So, first and foremost give praise to the Giver. Make sure you’re speaking well of God. Watch your words. They have power and they shape your life. Speak well of your life situation, your talents, your home life, your family, your job. Even if you don’t much like your employer, as long as you accept a paycheck, do not denigrate the company with your words. Pray for your life situation, expecting it to get better, for your talents, home life, your family, your job. Go to God in prayer with complaints, not to your best friend, neighbor, or to those at the water cooler.

Now, in the spirit of transparency, I have to tell you that I’m a great complainer. Boy can I murmur up a storm. So, I know God is giving me this “Word” for me first and foremost, but also for those who read this blog who are burdened about to the breaking point. I’ve gotten better about complaining and when I do catch myself complaining, I pray for those I’ve been murmuring about. I know this has helped me get through and is still helping me get through some difficult situations.

I know I’ve grown spiritually in this regard because I used to murmur about situations that weren’t even that important or threatening…just not to my liking. I don’t do that any more. I’ve improved. At least if I’m going to whine and complain now, it’s going to be about something significant. That’s just a stab at humor. My goal is to quit complaining and to be proactive in prayer and outlook, to develop some spiritual muscles.