Our Closest Relationships ~ how we damage them

Friends 3RELATIONSHIP, perhaps one of the most important and powerful words ever.

I’m a firm believer that my relationship with God is the most important relationship I have. It’s the one that upholds everything else in my life.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” ~ Genesis 2:18 [New American Standard Bible]

We were created to have relationships. In our society today we seem to be so isolated, lonely, even desperate. Depression seems to be epidemic. I know that in my life, building relationships with other people has been the key to happier days.

Yet, relationships are so easily damaged. Here is a list of five things (done to me, done to others, or I’ve done) that I’ve learned, from painful experience are huge NO-Nos. We could each make up our own list, and in fact, that’s a great idea. Make your personal list. Here’s mine.

1. Don’t take loved ones for granted and stop putting in effort. Don’t think they’ll always be there. For one reason or another, one day they won’t. Don’t stop treating them like they’re special. Don’t forget birthdays, anniversaries, school events and other occasions, family celebrations.

2. Don’t demean your loved one/friend in public. Don’t show greater respect to someone of higher status, of greater wealth, or who is just plain flashy…when that person will mean nothing to you in the long term and will have little impact on your life. Don’t constantly correct your loved one in public (or in private, for that matter).

3. Don’t constantly show you can do things better than your loved one. When your spouse, child, sibling, parent, friend washes the dishes, don’t pick up the water glasses, inspecting for spots and then begin to wash them over. This is an example. Anything in this vein is an insult.

horse laughing

4. Don’t engage in negative joking and banter, as a practice, with the ones you love. Have you noticed on reality TV these days the couples and/or family members are constantly belittling each other in the form of a joke? This is not good. This is hurtful. Because we are bombarded by this type of behavior on TV, doesn’t make is a healthy thing to do in our relationships. Habitual put-down jokes are very destructive.

5. Don’t lie…don’t sneak…and don’t cheat. Self-explanatory. Self-evident.

Treat others the same way you want them to treat you. ~ Luke 6:31 [New American Standard Bible]

 

 

‘Big Data’ Got It Wrong ~ epic fail

big-data

 

One of the things I love about America is the individualism of its people. I love quirky people with unique personalities who can’t be quantified and parceled into neat little marketing groups. I guess that’s why I’m not fond of focus groups. So, I wasn’t at all unhappy when ‘big data’ got it wrong about the 2016 election.

The fact that all the analysts couldn’t slice and dice and pigeon-hole the American people thrilled me, gave me hope for the future. I’m not speaking politically in terms of Republican or Democrat. I’m saying they couldn’t predict the behavior of the American electorate and I like that.

Of course I’m sure the analysts and marketeers are having break downs. They’ve made lots of money off of the American people and can well afford the price of their psychiatrists. So, I don’t feel too badly for them. They’re freaking out because they are now doubting their ability to accurately segment the American populace into groups they can sell more stuff to. That’s a good thing, IMO. And I’m not against selling. I’m not even against data. We just rely on it much too much. Especially in our intelligence agencies. We need to get operatives on the ground, but that’s another topic.

This is about what I’m for. I’m for the type individualism in America that has bread excellence. I’m for the American entrepreneurial spirit, creative genius, the can do attitude that has always been part of our nation. I’m for the get-up-and go that has been demonstrated in the American story. I’m for the colorful differences between the many groups in America (the races, religions, ethnicities…all of them, don’t leave out the ones that don’t appear to be PC). I love the pride and the quirks of regional America. I want to celebrate these attributes which are found in a people with spirit and a greater reliance on individualism.

Work at everything you do with all your heart. Work as if you were working for the Lord, not for human masters. ~ Colossians 3:23 [NIRV]

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. ~ Philippians 4:13 [KJV]